Today's track: "Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots" — The Flaming Lips
Sling Blade cost $1,600 new. I paid $250 for it.
He's a robot lawnmower. Named him Sling Blade — my buddy Eric Payne, over at Kentucky Private Lending, threw that name out and it was just right.
Backstory: I went through two mowers this season. Two. Was about to go buy a third when I talked to my AI about it instead. Robot mower. Told me what to look for, what it should cost, what to avoid.
Then The Universe did its thing. The people selling the exact mower I wanted live 0.03 miles from me — literally across the street, on Taylorsville Road. A doctor. Getting placed in Athens, Georgia, moving, selling the house themselves, no agent. House will probably go for $300–400K. We’ll see if it happens, but how mysterious the Universe can be. Spent half an hour talking real estate with my doctor….then my nurse. Real Estate talk is contagious at hospitals….😉
So: I bought a $250 lawnmower from my neighbors, and there's a chance I end up with a commission on their house. I didn't plan that. It just worked out that way.
Let's do some math on the mower, because the numbers are the whole point.
Kentucky's real mowing season runs about 35 weeks — April to November. Past that, cool-season grass slows down and nobody's out there weekly in January. So let's be honest about the season, not the whole calendar.
GreenPal's own data says a full-season weekly customer mows about once every 7 days. Thirty-five mows at $55 a pop is $1,925 a season.
Sling Blade runs Monday, Wednesday, Friday — that's the baseline; some weeks I run him more because I just like watching him work and for the neighbors and the neighbors kids to enjoy, they all love it and text me about it. Even on the baseline, that's 105 outings over the same 35-week season on a $250 machine. Do the division and he pays for himself 7.7 times over in one season. Net savings, season one: $1,675. Every season after that, since he's already paid for, it's the full $1,925 back in my pocket, every year, for as long as he runs that and time.
And that's with the deal I got. Run it at full retail — $1,600, no lucky neighbors across the street — and he still pays for himself before the season's even over, with $325 left on top. Every season after that is the same $1,925, clean.
So get yourself a fun little toy. Stand in your own yard with your own coffee. And if you run a business out of a home office, there's a real conversation to have with your CPA about writing part of it off — talk to your local CPA, or hit reply and I'll send you mine (THE GOAT!).
He's not alone in the house, either. Lurch is my Roomba. Molly is my mop — she goes an hour after Lurch, cleaning up whatever he missed. All have squiggly eyes, romanticize your lives. Remind me to tell you about my plastic cockroaches I GIFT to couples…and they love it. Reddit hack I read a decade ago…Romanticize your life.
In December of 2020, I bought a Tesla Model X. Not because I'm flashy. I had a Subaru Forester before this. I bought it because you can depreciate a vehicle over 5,500 lbs (6,000 lbs now I believe) 100% in the year you buy it. Straight tax math. I got Full Self-Driving because it was on sale, and the pitch got me: eventually it robo-taxis itself, and the liability of owning a car turns into an asset instead. That is right up my alley! I like to lead by example….but Tesla has taken a minute to get things going, such is life right?
My license plate reads BRRRR — Buy, Rehab, Rent, Refinance, Repeat. It's the investing strategy I've built a good chunk of my portfolio on and helped my clients build their’s on, so now it rides around Louisville on the back of my car. My voicemail used to say “Rob BRRRRgeron here.” Now, I’m leaning towards you can’t spell robot without Rob! I crack myself up. I made sure to call David Greene former host of biggerpockets to let him know I snagged it, told him to grab it in California for himself as well. Romanticize your life. I hope everyone I know recognizes me driving and waves hello. It happens all the time honestly! I wear my BRRRR like a badge of honor.
Then my dog passed away. Walter. Walter was an aging senior I dog that I adopted. Sweet boy!
I named the car Walter. You know? Re-in-CAR-nation. Now ,when I activate Full Self-Driving — when I actually turn it on and let the car take over — that's Walter driving. I'll say, "Walter, are you trying to get me killed?" Or I'll pat the dash: "Good boy, Walter. Thanks for getting me home." It's a strange, small way to still connect with my deceased dog every day. I didn't expect a car to give me that. But it did. Romanticize your life.
I don't know. Maybe I'm doing this a little differently than most people. But you're going to see this everywhere soon and when the physical robots show up, the ones folding laundry and doing the stuff we really don't want to do, it's going to be a whole different level. My neighbors both pay lawn guys. I wonder what they think watching Sling Blade go by. Is this the end for them? Not close, honestly. But it's worth thinking about how fast things are evolving and being implemented. Winner Realty has a fully built out AI front of house built out, Robby. Handle’s all inbound leads, buyers, sellers, investors, inquiries, everything gets addressed immediately. Let me know if you want me to turn down the puns. Romanticize your life.
For now, I'm just an early adopter, drinking my coffee, watching my $250 robot mow the yard. Which my sister and brother in law fully set up for me! When I was I was a kid mowing a much bigger yard, I was $20. Inflation amiright? The rest of the week we will be focusing more in depth on new skills to take into this new economy. I’m here to empower! Tune in! Thanks again for reading! Maybe…..romanticize your life.
📊 Yesterday's poll: Kaelin's plaque carried the day — 36% called it "case closed." The Old Fashioned purists came in last at 9%, while “Louisville has it, but not first” and the Hot Brown loyalists tied at 27% each. Nobody's backing down on any of it.
Today's poll:
Where are you on AI actually showing up in your day-to-day life?
Warmly,
Rob Bergeron
Owner–Realtor at Award-Winning Winner Realty
Winner Realty | OffMarket.deals | Property Partner Data Company
Schedule time to discuss your goals, bottlenecks, or whatever’s on your mind — book me here.
PS: Last week, this issue became the most read issue of The Morning Bergeron at 38,000 reads! This issue highlighted flood history, racial history of Louisville, and flood plain tips and tricks from our years of experience at Winner Realty. Closely followed by the Nashville comparison newsletter. Olmstead Parks ←Developer of Central Park in New York issue closely behind.
PSS: Got someone looking for 25+ acres within 100 miles of Louisville, near an interstate, cash in hand — wants it for hunting now, a cabin or home eventually. Budget’s around $250K–$300K. If you’ve got land like that, or know someone who does, hit reply.
PSSS: What my mortgage guy is seeing right now: 30-year’s at 6.95%, 15-year’s at 6.26%, and rising rates are actually working in buyers’ favor — sellers are picking up more closing costs and rate buydowns just to get deals done. There’s also a newer program that lets rental income from an appraisal-based rent analysis count toward qualifying for a second mortgage, so keeping your low rate on your current house while buying the next one is more doable than it used to be. If any of that’s relevant to what you’re working on, hit reply and I’ll point you in the right direction. Be sure to hug your local mortgage lender. 47.3% of mortgage lenders have left the industry since 2021. Nearly half, that is insane! Survival of the most capable, adaptable, and well equipped!
PSSSS: I’m Taking Swimming Lessons.